O Captain, My Captain

"Sucking the marrow out of life doesn't mean choking on the bone." - Robin Williams as John Keating, 'The Dead Poet's Society.'

If there is one film that I could recommend that is completely wonderful, it is 'The Dead Poet's Society.' I saw it for the first time a couple of months ago and loved it. I found it very uplifting. Sure, there are some parts that are saddening, but in the end it is a tale of a bunch of boys who are taught all about breaking out of the cages they've been placed in by society.

It struck a chord with me actually. As someone whose entire life has been 'pre-destined', in the words of my Dad, it feels very refreshing to know that I can make things happen the way that I want them to. Of course, as a Christian, I have to trust in the will of God, and I can honestly say that I want to embrace God's path for my life, but, also honestly, sometimes I just don't feel like it.

At the age of 16, I chose to go to College to study Performing Arts, much to the disgust of some people who thought it was a waste of time, and now that I'm at University studying Law, (completely different career path, I know!), I can look back and say that it was worth it. I would not be the person I am today if I hadn't chosen to go there. I became a stronger person for it. I've gone from being this mouse that wouldn't say boo to a goose, to someone who can stand up for herself, her choices and what she believes in. I'm not a little girl any more, I am a woman, and I can live in confidence. Don't get me wrong, sometimes I'll have what I like to call a 'personality relapse', where there are select people who, for some reason, I return to my old 'mousey' character,  I just cannot say "Hey, back off, will ya?". I might be thinking it but I don't always do it. Usually it's someone who I think has a large influence on me or a role to play in my life, such as a person in authority, or as I found at one point, someone I loved, to the point that if they hurt me or did something I hated, I would keep my mouth shut and let it eat away at me inside.

Any of you know that feeling?

It doesn't have to be that way.

The fundamental purpose of my life is to be the best I can be, be as happy as I can possibly be, and to spread that happiness to everyone else. (Did you hear that joke about the butter?)

All that matters?

Love, Happiness, Joy and Laughter.

So suck the marrow out of life, just remember not to choke on the bone!

Abi xx